We melt like sugar into black coffee

[impersona]

TAKING REQUESTS FOR VALENTINE'S DAY DRABBLES YEAAAAAAAAAAAAH

Give me an OTP and a detailed prompt, and I will give you a 100-300 word fic in response!   I have been particularly itching to do crack fic lately - like, off-the-wall non-canon ships (like Samuel and Jay making out in the elevator).  Or canon ships in really cracky AUs (Devo and Galen in Pokemon AU).  OR PLAIN STUFF IF YOU WANNA BE VANILLA.   I want to smash through them tomorrow (day off FINALLY), but I will have them done by the end of the week.   Put multiple requests if you want, and I'll pick my favorite.

I also have my schmoop bingo board to get through, so you can use that as reference!  It's here.

Gearing back into action, posting like a beast soon!

Comments

Like Jaws, except with less emotional depth

[impersona]

Mara wrung her pale hair in her hands, looked over her shoulder, and convinced herself that this was the most awkward experience in her life. She was with Prince Deon alone at last, exactly like she had planned. But now that they were out here, on this boat, he didn't talk to her much, and when he did it was about horses and weather and other land-things she didn't care about. When he asked her a question, she gave him back vague answers and grunts - but that was the deal she made with the sea-witch, not to tell him stuff like her real home and real body.

But worst of all, she didn't seem close to seducing this stupid prince, which would seal the other half of that deal. What had she done wrong? She even put the biggest, brightest bow she could find in her hair, but despite it, he didn't glance at her twice. At least, Mara didn't think that he did.

Damn it, why did she give up most of her vision for stupid legs? Hardly a good trade at all. He was just a few feet away from her, but even with bottle-glasses, all she could see of him was a tan and orange blur. And she insisted on getting a scenic boat ride of the river, but couldn't see any of that either. She didn't know what to do with her legs in this cramped boat, crossing them awkwardly and trying to ignore the itch of the horrid hose the maids had forced on her.

At least on this ride, she had the benefit of being near the water again. Mara dipped her fingers into the water, brushing against flowering lotus and cattails. She thought she saw two large snakes glide under her hand, but didn't put much stock into it. She was seeing shadows and blurs everywhere as it was.

A small wave disturbed, taking the lotus out of her reach. Mara sulked back into her seat.

"You're rocking the boat," she said dully.

"Don't criticize me." Mara heard the grinding of wood as he turned the paddles. The boat wobbled a bit to the right, probably through the uneven force of Deon's rowing. "I'm doing all of the work."

"You paddle like a flailing walrus." She crossed her arms tightly over her chest. "I can't even hear the animals properly with you splashing so much."

At that, Mara swore she could hear Deon roll his eyes. "Not like animals have much to say."

She thought she saw the snakes again - but forgot about it when something struck the bottom of the boat, right under her. Mara bit down a cry of shock and clamped her hands hard over her seat. "What was that?"

The prince looked over the sides of the boat. "Maybe we hit a log?"

They floated for a moment, looking over the sides but unable to find anything even resembling a tree. Deon rowed cautiously again, and after a minute another hit rocked the boat, this one seeming to strike the dead center.

"What do you keep on hitting?"

"It's not me," he said, standing up on his feet. "Stay down."

No deal. Mara moved unsteadily onto her feet as well. "Move over and give me those water dalunkers."

"They're called oars, and they're too heavy for you."

"You're the one who can't steer this stupid thing, and you have no idea what my arms can do-"

Something banged on Deon's side of the little boat, and both of them lost their handle on the oars, which slipped out into the water. He tried to grab the sides for support when the bow got hit again, rocked the boat upwards and knocked Deon forward into her.

Mara caught him against her chest, but immediately skittered back, needing to get away from him. She couldn't help herself. His face had gotten way too close to hers for an instant, his lips and hers, they had nearly...

But moving backwards was a mistake. Though she was a newcomer to things like gravity and balance, even she could feel the boat rock waver under her. Without her help, Deon lost his balance again, and his weight pushed it over the edge.

"Deon-"

"Hold on-"

The boat turned over, its hull blocking out the sunlight for an instant. Then it crashed down, and both were thrown deep underwater.

---

This sensation of sinking... oh, Mara considered it a blessing compared to the chaos of the boat. She floated a dozen feet down, closed her eyes and pretended she might be back in the ocean. Able to see everything clearly, and decked in jewels and a crown and all the loot she could carry. In the waters of home, she would hear Lynn and Raquel and Jane and her other sisters call her for counsel with Grandmother. It was familiar, comfortable. Bliss.

But reality, and an annoying dependency on air, pressed her to swim to the surface again. While she had the chance, she yanked off her hose and let it drop to the bottom of the pool. Good riddance. The water against her bare legs and toes felt so much better, nearly natural after days of land-bound strangeness.

Mara surfaced, and after a moment wondered where the prince had gone. She felt waves bob against ther right shoulder and swam that way, and nearly ran right into him. How had she missed the familiar sound of his splashing and sputtering? Deon treaded water, but seemed barely able to keep his chin above the surface.

She grabbed his collar and dragged him up, pulling him along as she swam towards land. "Stupid, are you made of rocks?"

He kicked along after her, his breath was shaky either from shock or from the cold of the water. "I'm not good with boats."

"Clearly! The only captain you are is of the obvious." She huffed at the water below the surface for a moment, sending up angry bubbles around her nose. "At least you fell off a smaller ship this time."

"What?" He stopped kicking, and somehow, she felt his sharp gaze train on her before she even turned to look at him. "Mara, how would you know about that?"

With only a few inches between Deon's face and hers now, she saw her prince clearly for the first time in days. She didn't mean to, but suddenly her heart stammered in her chest. He certainly didn't look handsome now, not with his hair plastered to his face and looking half-drowned...but he had looked the same way when she first saved him, hadn't he?

She had tried so hard to forget what she did for him the night of that storm, tried to forget the pity she felt as she watched him drown, and the aching when she later left him on shore. But those feelings were the truth. It had been more than the sea-witch's dare that brought Mara above the surface. Because there was something in this prince she needed to take for herself, a draw so strong that it pulled her out from under the waves, from her very home.

But she didn't know what a mermaid could want from a human, or understand her strange reaction to seeing him like this, or even if either of those things had anything to do with winning the sea-witch's bet. So Mara looked away from his face, and ignored those feelings all over again.

"I made your servant tell me," Mara said, utterly confident in her lie. "He said you lost your bearings while on His Majesty's sturdiest ship and fell off the side." She splashed the water between them with her fist. "Then sunk like a sack of rice."

His lips twitched. "Did he tell you it was during a hurricane?"

"Yes." Mara turned away from him, and started pulling him towards the shoreline again. "And that even the dog managed to stay aboard."

He was taller than her, and was able to touch the bottom of the shore before she could. Mara had absolutely no need to be carried out of the water, but when he twisted her around and pulled her legs up in his other arm, she didn't find a choice in the matter. She folded her hands behind his neck and remained quietly grateful that she didn't have to walk right now.

And all this could have been nearly sweet. Could have.

"You know what, lady," Prince Deon finally said, when his boots hit the beach, "I wish you wouldn't run your mouth so much."